When your child comes home with blood or a rip on his shirt. He fell down is usually the answer you get when asked what happened. Still there is the lingering thought and wonder if your child is dealing with schoolyard bullies.
Usually a schoolyard bully is a child, often bigger than their peers, who uses their size as a means to manipulate and take advantage of other children. Often the bully senses the vulnerability of other students and capitalizes on those feelings. They try to gain control of other children by use of intimidation and sometimes violence.
Children who are bullied are easily manipulated. They have low self-esteem and may become anxious or depressed. Unfortunately, depending upon the severity of the bullying a child receives, they may turn into the very thing that they hate. They may become a bully when they get older.
Often times children who are bullies often become a bully because they feel inadequate in some way. Perhaps their parents are divorced or one of them is abusive. If they are manipulated through violence it may be the only way they know how to get the recognition they need and desire.
Tell your child that no matter what is happening you’re there for them. Be sure they understand that you want to help them and they can tell you anything. They may feel intimidated to the point that they are afraid to talk to you. Reassure them that whatever is happening isn’t their fault.
Help your child deal with the situation by helping them to not be an easy target for a bully. Teach them to stand up straight, speak with a clear voice, and to look their peers in the eyes. By carrying themselves in this way, they will not appear weak or vulnerable. Explain to them that bullies generally try to find children that are alone where that they can’t be seen or heard.
Many parents, when learning that their child has been bullied, decide to enroll their child in martial arts classes so they can take care of themselves. This may not be the best course of action. Violence often breeds violence and you don’t want to encourage your child to start down that road.
Sometimes kids can be cruel without being a bully. When it’s your child that has been the victim of bullying, you want to do whatever possible to get the bullying to stop and for your child to be safe. Perhaps your child isn’t dealing with schoolyard bullies, but to be on the safe side, you may want to speak with your child’s school so they can be aware of the situation and to take care of any problems.
This is a great article. I’ve heard all kinds of stories in the news about bullies, and worry about how to handle that situation when I face it with my own son. I really like your suggestions about acting in manners that will reduce their chances of being bullied, rather than learning how to beat the bully up.